Why I love being the bumbling ballerina
I got all sweaty in Body Jam dance class yesterday. It's one of my favorite things ever, of all time. It just makes me happy......... but sometimes it is frustrating too. I was the one facing forward when I should have been facing back. I was 2 steps behind and at times flailing like a dancing balloon in front of a car dealer. A couple of times I just forgot the whole combination and spun in circles, and leaped through the air. For sure I was the white girl in the back that was missing the hip-hop gene. It was so far from performance worthy and had more then a few flaws, yet I go back week after week. I could have let the class be frustrating and allow it to put me in a bad mood, but I didn't. Yesterday we learned a new routine. The control freak in me wants to just know it and not have to go through the awkward stage of being the dork-a-saurs in the back. But we all have to be a beginner at some point. Being a beginner sucks, especially when you compare yourself to others that have more experience (or rhythm) than you. But you have to be a beginner before you can be anything else. It's through our mistakes and failures that we can learn our greatest lessons. And it is those experiences that so clearly point out our flaws. Have you ever screwed up so bad that you felt like a blinking neon arrow was illuminating you everywhere you go? Have you ever felt like every eye in the room was fixed on you? Sometimes our life is like the bumbling ballerina in the back of the stage who has turned the wrong way and is so out of sync that your eyes are drawn right to her. So here's my advice. Set aside the shame, and SHINE! Maybe you didn't mean for it to happen but now this is your moment to steal the spotlight. Smile, laugh and keep moving. Close your eyes and feel the music, make up your own dance, spin and leap, kick and twerk it. At the end of the performance, your impromptu solo will be the thing that people will remember and talk about. Perfection isn't possible, so relax and accept that we are all learning. It's our flaws that make us stand out. It's the way we keep moving and learning that make us awesome, together that makes us Flawsome. So week after week I go back to class, and I get better each time, but from time to time the bumbling ballerina makes an appearance and steals the show. I can't help it. It's more interesting when you can be and fabulous and just let go and I'm not going to lie, having any excuse to wear a tutu and dance is a special kind of day.